weakkkkk

"These canals, it seems
They all go in circles
Places look the same,
And we're the only difference"

These words from one of my favorite artists really pins the tail on the donkey regarding my feelings right now. Visiting home is refreshing at times, but at other times it just reminds you of why you left. I love my family more than anything in the world. I love my friends, but I've realized that I don't love or miss the way high school used to be. It's never good being on the outside, but I really think it's even worse being on the outside while wanting to be on the outside. Never feeling the urge to speak up. Not really wanting to talk about my life. I've realized I got a really good thing going. I got 3 awesome guys up at school. I'll never disrespect The Squad ever. Having the privilege of getting to know these young men has changed the way I see my "friends". Brotherhood is so real, real friends are so beautiful. People that are willing to tell you the truth should be cherished. And I've realized coming back home that I hold that part of me back here. I suppress my actions and just observe and wait, to only find out that nothing's really changed besides me. I never did fit the mold. I just wasn't cut out for this stuff I guess. Or maybe I'm just tired of it?