hey, you are beautiful.

I feel like I should have something awesome to write about right now since it's been awhile, but I'm just not there yet. But ya know I was thinking again and my mind told me that maybe someone just needs to hear that they are beautiful. So here I am... If you've been having a tough time these past couple days or maybe life isn't going as you've planned, I would just like to let you know that you are beautiful, and someone loves you :). I hope if you are the person that needs this that maybe this will brighten your day just a little bit? Please?

I've been having a tough week too, but it's just a flesh wound. I'm stronger than my circumstances and I know for a fact that we have the ability to do great things in less than great situations. Let's keep a smile on and go out there and make somebody's day! Someone needs YOU! Stay sunshiny.

8)

25 Things

It's a good night tonight... and I'm stealing another cool thing from Heather's blog. Heather... thanks for being super cool!

Just 25 random things, facts, goals, or habits about Mervyn.

1. God is all I've got. Every time I think I figure myself out it's only to realize that I am nothing without him. My mind begins to take over my life and logical thinking kills any purpose of life on Earth. God gives me the foundation I need to live, and his grace and mercy alone are the only things that keep me sane. Though I may not show it 100 percent of the time I love him with all I got and I owe my life to him.

2. Just in case you didn't know, I am part jamaican and chinese.

3. I think way too much and it's a problem. A lot of what I think is really just contradictory to the previous thoughts that I think. For example I sometimes feel that life really doesn't have a meaning but at the same time I know I gotta go out and do the right stuff and make something of myself. I get caught up in that back and forth stuff sometimes. Weird.

4. I change a lot. It's not bad change, but I feel like everyday I'm creating myself. I sorta dig it.

5. I love people and how they affect me. For instance the first exposure to older "cool" kids that I had when I moved to Ashburn was my neighbor up the street that skateboarded. I saw him skating and thought it was super cool so I started to learn. Now that I've been skating for about 8 years it's a big part of my life and I use skateboarding and longboarding to get away from stress. It all started with a kid I never knew up the street. Life's cool like that.

6. Call me what you will but I'm a sucker for chick flicks.

7. I gotta couple best friends. I think they deserve to be mentioned here because they have all been there for me when I've needed them no matter what. I look up to these 3 individuals so much and I'm so blessed to have them all as such great friends. Thank you so much Anne Fiala, Jordon Durst, and Cody Andersen! You three make life that much more beautiful.

8. I am obsessed with 80's dance, EDM, and House.

9. If I could be any animal I'd be a Sea Turtle. They're just chill like that.

10. I really don't get into relationships often but I've had two decent ones in my life and I just would like to say regardless of the outcomes, I really appreciate those two people and I just want you to know that you both will be very successful. Keep your eyes on the prize and reach for the skies. You deserve all this life has to offer.

11. Favorite color is purple.

12. I have a slight obsession with shoes. I own 11 pairs of vans alone.

13. I find myself spending a lot of alone time lately. This summer has been a great way for me to realize who I am and what I want. Self-examination is a key to success.

14. To be honest I don't know what I'm gonna be when I grow up. I'm planning on getting into Info Tech stuff and trying to work at the CIA or something but I don't know where I belong. There are days when it scares me and there are days when it gets me pumped.

15. I value relationships a lot. I really want to be super tight with everyone but it's tough because a lot of the time I don't really want to be in the middle of everything.

16. I HATE TEXTING! It's just really inconvenient for a guy like me. I'm down with some quick info or a hey now and again but I'm just not that guy that sits with his phone all day and has random conversations. It's not that I don't appreciate the small talk it's just that I don't like having to pick up the phone every 2 minutes and read and type and repeat. If you want to have a good talk please just call me, I like to hear people's voices anyways :)

17. I have an odd obsession with lava lamps. When I get my own place I'll probably have one in each room.

18. Since I started DJing I've become madly obsessed with vinyl. It is my goal to have a vinyl collection for me to chill on my rocker and listen to when I'm 60.

19. I do car detailing with a family friend for a summer job and one time me and a fellow worker that was from Jamaica went to this lady's house to clean her car and as we were backing out her van her husband came out and started yelling at us to get out of the car. I was dumbfounded 'til I realized that he thought we were stealing her car. The woman came out to make him stop and get him back inside the house. He left without an apology. As much as I wish I could say it isn't, race is still an issue in this country. Ignorance is ignorance and it sucks sometimes to be black.

20. I could listen to How He Loves Us for a year straight and it would still put tears in my eyes.

21. I have this little life box thing that is overflowing with odd things that I've collected. Some of these things are christmas cards, hotel keys, movie stubs, letters, etc. Somewhere deep in my mind I give a lot of sentimental value to some interesting things. I feel like it'll all mean something more some day.

22. Getting passed my past is one of the hardest things for me to do. I'm really my toughtest critic and it gets bad. I expect a lot from myself which is cool but when I don't meet my own standards I'll be the first guy to put myself down. I'm workin on that.

23. My parents are the best parents in the world. I wouldn't have been able to be me and be as successful as I am without them. They've supported every single decision I've made and have kept me safe and have given me confidence. I love them with all my heart and one day I hope my own kids would be able to say the same of me if God is willing.

24. It took me 'til about junior year of high school to get comfortable in myself. I hope everyone gets to a place where having themself and being happy with who they are is good enough. It seems like everyone is looking for a quick fix... you can't love anyone else if you truly don't love yourself.

25. I like to dance. I like Ping Pong. I like Paintball. I like wristwatches and bracelets. I like wayfarers and snapbacks. I like eras and white tees. I like natural light and 50mm lenses. I like smiles and bright eyes. I like writing letters and reading blogs. I like standing on top of a mountain just to look out on all of creation. I love coexistance. I wish there could be a day where every single person in the world just smiled at the same time. My pastor once said in a sermon that life is like a game of Monopoly, at the end of the day, all the pieces and property you've acquired just go back in the box. The sad thing is it's true. We need to focus on others and loving one another. It's easier said than done but I'm workin' on it. :D

Keep The Peace

Sometimes I worry just long enough to realize that there was nothing for me to worry about in the first place :)

Thank You God.

Brooklyn's Finest

Well I probably know what your first thought is... you probably think this is going to be a movie review of some sort, which it could still probably turn out that way but my point to this post is far from it. I've been very moved by this and I hope that whatever I write will you give you the least bit of understanding of how I'm feeling right now.

So it's movie night tonight with the family and it has been decided that Brooklyn's Finest was next up. As the movie wore on my family slowly evacuated the family room 'til it was only my Dad and I watching this movie. In case you are unaware, Brooklyn's Finest is rated R and the story is about some dirty cops and drug dealers within the projects of Brooklyn. I bet there's a lot of people out there that thought this was a good movie and a part of me feels agrees with them, but my heart really wasn't settled while watching this movie.

I guess you could call me over sensitive but the excessive amounts of cursing and graphic sex scenes really just broke me up inside. It literally pains me to watch women in situations where their surroundings or their lifestyle has turned them into sex slaves. It hurts to see people lie, cheat, and steal to get by. More than anything this movie just reminded me of how twisted the world can be sometimes. To be honest it was a movie I wish I had never seen because it just put me in a bad mood. I was speechless at the end just thinking to myself about how blessed I am.

After the movie was over I just sat for a little while. I had consumed so much of this dark life that I'd seen on the screen that I couldn't think. My head was like a whirlwind of greif. Something within me was just broken over this movie and that feeling just led me to talk to God about it. Something in me was just telling me to just take the time to get away from my life and just focus on Him. So I did. I went to my room and I started to weep. I have never cried like that in my life, and it was over a movie. I couldn't speek. Whatever I saw on that screen just put my mind into a place where it didn't need to be. The movie just reminded me of how much I don't belong in this world. It reminded me of all the things I wish I could change, the things I wish never existed. It reminded me that there is darkness and evil out there. All that thinking made me realize that what I had seen on the screen is a reality for some human beings in this world. And that tore me apart.

Those girls are somebody's daughters. There are guys out there that are just trying to make it and are willing to do anything. People lose their lives everyday and all they get are a couple of seconds on the daily news. That hurts me. Those people are real, and they deserve more, regardless of who they are. So as I sat there in a puddle of my own thoughts I prayed to God about this world. More so I just prayed about myself, that He would bring me into a place where I could walk with him and that my pride wouldn't keep me so blind for so long. It was interesting because I told him about how wise I thought I was and how in hindsight he knows that those who believe they are wise in worldy ways are truly foolish and he uses those that are fools and fills them up with spirtitual wisdom. Those who trust and have faith in him.

After talking with him I opened up my Bible. I just started reading 1 Corinthians this past week because I'd been seeing a lot of great verses coming out of there and Paul seems to be a really down to Earth and straightforward writer with a lot of passion. As I began to read I stumbled upon some verses that blew my mind.It's 1 Corinthians 3:16-19 and it says,

"Don't you realize that all of you together are the temple of God and that the Spirit of God lives in you? God will destroy anyone who destroys this temple. For God's temple is holy, and you are the temple. Stop deceiving yourselves. If you think you are wise by this world's standards, you need to become a fool to be truly wise. For the wisdom of this world is foolish to God."

This was nuts because I had just prayed to Him about this exact feeling I had inside right before I opened The Word and He responded within the book I was reading at the right time by saying, "Don't you understand that you belong to me? You are holy and I will protect you against anyone or anything that attempts to harm you." And then He goes on by showing me that He heard what I was saying by bringing up the same exact thing I just prayed to Him about. This whole sequence of events that have transpired out of a really graphic movie have moved me to state with 100 percent confidence that God IS Good, and He loves YOU! God works in so many mysterious ways and it is truly an honor to have the opportunity to get to know Him. I am so blessed and so thankful for the life He has given me, and regardless of where I am today or tomorrow He is mine and I am His.

Keep The Peace

boredumb

This is what happens when I'm bored... embrace it.

Next time you will kiss someone?
I dee K

What were you doing before you got on the computer?
shower

Have you ever given up on anyone?
yes

Is there a difference between the word 'best friend' and 'friend'?
not sure

When is the last time someone of the opposite sex gave you a hug?
yesterday

Have you ever kissed this person?
not really

Can you handle the truth?
yup

Do you think that people are trustworthy?
very few

Do you tend to fall for players?
haha no

Are you easy to make mad?
no

Do you think relationships are even worth it?
yarp

Who can always cheer you up?
j dizzle

Is it usually easy for someone to make you smile?
usually

Do you own anything Vera Bradley?
no

Would you ever dye your hair black?
it is black.

Do any girls/guys hate you because you went out with their ex?
nope

Are you nice to everyone?
for the most part

Ever receive a really long apology?
yarp

Does it really bother you when someone lies to you?
yes

Does playing the guitar make a girl/guy more attractive?
nah.. singing is more attractive

You go home with a hickey, what does your mother say?
probably a dangggggggg egey!

Do you have any siblings?
yarp

Is it possible to be single and happy?
most definitely

Are you afraid of falling in love?
why would I be afraid?

have you ever been in love?
nope

Do you like your school?
I think so... I'm super pumped for PITT!

Has a boy ever given you roses?
haha nope

Does it bother you when people try to make you jealous?
not really, it doesn't work very well

Are you happier now, or 4 months ago?
maybe 4 months ago, I was just saved, but life is good!

Ever talked to someone that was drunk?
haha yea

Do you enjoy drama?
nah

Have you ever had your heart broken?
nope

Do you secretly like someone?
nah

Do you give out second chances easily?
not easily, but they happen

When was the last time you worked at your job?
today

What were you doing this morning at 7am?
getting stood up in DC by a mean lady -_-

Do you like to text or call more?
call

Whose bed did you sleep in last night?
mine

Have you held hands with anyone in the past week?
nope

Have you faced any of your fears lately?
nope

Would you kiss anyone you've texted today?
nope

You kissed someone today, didn't you?
no.

Do you believe ex's can be friends?
nope.

If you were granted one wish, what would you wish for?
everyone to know jesus. (heather this was awesome!)

Have you ever kissed the last person you texted?
no hahaha

what if you saw the last person you kissed kissing someone else?
it's alright, she deserves to be happy

Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?
no.

What color are your eyes?
brown

do you get along with girls?
yarp

Ever kissed in the rain?
no.

So tell me about your life?
quality. God is good. I love my family. I have a sweet job. I'm going to the college of my dreams. I have a plan and purpose. I am happy.

Look in your inbox in your phone, who are all the people you have texts from?
Reed, Zack Miller, J dizzle, my boss, Michael Meadows, Adam Farah, Drew Stil, Mom, Dunlap, Jennnay, Nick Lowrey, Heather, Meredith, Lynnsey, Tyler, Russow, Kevin, Dad, Cali, Tiff, Molly, Frank, Cody, Kevin, Danny, Roopali, Abdul, Kathryn, Frank, Brittany Loveless

What's the last thing you touched, other than your computer?
phone cause I just did that question durr

Do you have plans for tonight?
yes

Honestly, who was the last person to tell you that they love you?
mommy

Are you wearing anything that belongs to someone else?
nope

Who was the last person you had a conversation with on the phone?
j dizzle

Do you prefer the ocean or pool?
ocean

What is in your backpack right now?
bible, swimsuit, t-shirt, mints, pencil, highlighter, sharpie, headband, socks, water, shoelace,

You're going on a road trip: What MUST you bring with you?
phone, clothes, money, music, bible, sunshades, g-shock, silly bands

Are you outgoing or more shy?
Depends who I'm around, a little bit of both.

Are you wearing jeans right now?
nah

What was the last thing you drank?
orange gatorade

Did you sleep in past noon today?
nope, slept in 'til 5 haha

Do you miss your past?
yup.

Would you be able to date someone who doesn't make you laugh?
no.

How would your parents react if you got a tattoo?
they probably wouldn't care

Have you argued with anyone today?
nope

Are promises important to you?
yup

Where is the biggest scar on your body?
left quad

If you had to dye your hair a color what color would it be?
black

What was the last thing in your mouth?
potbelly

Who was the last person you took a picture with?
kath

Are you waiting for something?
nope

Where were you last night?
home

Who's hoodie did you wear last?
mine

Is there something you're not looking forward to?
taking my math placement exam

Is there a specific reason you're not dating the last person you texted?
i'm not gay.

Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone?
nope

I bet your texting someone right now aren't ya?
no. I hate texting

Is anything bugging you right now?
somebody is

Is there something you want to say to somebody?
yup.

Last person you rode in a car with under the age of 21?
j dizzle

Does it matter to you if your boyfriend/girlfriend smokes?
yes.

Was the first person you talked to today male or female?
female

Does anyone hate you?
most likely

How is your heart at this moment?
happy and in its place

Does your password have to do with a boy/girl?
nope

Does anyone besides you know it?
nah but my parents could figure it out

Do you use facebook?
yarp

Is there something that makes you angry?
yes

If you could go back in time and change things, would you?
nah

Do you like to sleep in a warm or cold room?
more cold than warm but not freezing

What are you listening to now?
nuffin

What are your favorite colors?
purple, yellow

Do you want to know the date of your death?
why would I want to know that?

Have you broken the law in the last 3 days?
speeding?

Do you know anyone that smokes weed?
yea

Do you like strawberry and banana smoothie?
YES!

What are your favorite word[s]?
gazebo (sp), vicious, quality, gnar gnar,

Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can tell anything to?
yes

Do you want to please everyone?
not really, some people aren't worth pleasing

Was yesterday fun?
work -_-

Do you have a best friend?
yup

How are you feeling right now?
pretty mellow

Did you go out or stay in last night?
stayed in, I had work early

Plans for tomorrow?
work.

Everyone deserves a second chance, right?
most definitely

When a friend walks out of your life, do you go after them or let them go?
Let them go, people come and go like seasons. The friends that really are the ones that stick around.

Where was your default picture taken?
my room.

Have you ever talked to someone when they were high?
yup

Have you ever been asked out by someone you didn't want to date?
nope.

Digital Love

Music is soooooo awesome! I really think I was in need of a favorite song. So many songs have filtered through my ears within the past year and it's been awhile since something has really caught me by surprise like the song Digital Love by Daft Punk has. It pretty much culminates the peices I'd ever want in a song right now. Bumpin' bass, catchy lyrics, break down, gnar shredding electro guitar solo, and a proper resolution. Everytime I listen to this song whether it be remixes or the original it just gets me jammin. I appreciate its simplicity and its musicianship at the same time. I wish people in the US were down with dancing to EDM more than hip hop and top 40 songs. When will the notorious grinding days be over? I feel like that's not even fun really. I don't see any self expression in grinding. It's almost like an obligation, and I know when people's jams come on at home their first instinct isn't to go grind up on a wall. If that song was playing throughout the world and you were the only one in it you'd boogie on down, so why don't people do that at parties? Sometimes you just need to break free and go on a journey. This song is a sunroof open, windows down, arm out the window, wayfarer rockin' banger, and if I ever heard it outside of my house or car I'd go nuts.


Last night I had a dream about you
In this dream I'm dancing right beside you
And it looked like everyone was having fun
the kind of feeling I've waited so long

Don't stop come a little closer
As we jam the rythm gets stronger
There's nothing wrong with just a little little fun
We were dancing all night long

The time is right to put my arms around you
You're feeling right
You wrap your arms around too
But suddenly I feel the shining sun
Before I knew it this dream was all gone

Ooh I don't know what to do
About this dream and you
I wish this dream comes true

Ooh I don't know what to do
About this dream and you
We'll make this dream come true

Why don't you play the game ?
Why don't you play the game ?

Classic.

I'm just in that mood right now.

My summer has been super bleh and I just don't know what to do about it.
I'm not excited about things anymore, I feel like I've lost my edge.
All I can think about is this freaking math placement exam I have to take...
And I suck at math.
I don't know if I suck at it or if I just don't have the patience or discipline.
Sometimes I just wish I could trade brains with someone smarter.
It's weird how the life that I've feared living is encroaching upon me.
Maybe I've just spent too much time thinking.
I don't even remember the last time I had fun which is sad.
People I knew I don't even know anymore.
Summer has literally just burned my head out.
I wish I just knew what I wanted to do with myself.
I guess it wouldn't make anything easier, but it'd be nice for my mind to be at ease.
I just don't know where I fit.
I never thought I'd say this but I miss where I was at freshman year.
I need to get happy about something.
What do people do when they feel like this?

all my problems would be solved if I was just good at math.

today sucked.

It's true... it was just one of those days where you just can't do anything right. It doesn't happen to me often, but days like today really kill me. They're the days that I wish I really could have the strength to keep a cool head, but most of the time more than anything I just wanna punch some walls in. When days like today happen I feel like people don't understand who I am, or what I tried to do, and they just see the outside of the picture. I hate situations that look really bad on the surface so no matter what justification you have for the events that have occured, they never seem to matter. Times like these are the only times I get close to crying. Frustration makes me more emotional than anything.

It's crazy how a day that starts out with 4 hours of church can turn into an annoyance. But it's also crazy how at the end of each one of these days, I'm still alive. And I get over it. I think today was the quickest day I've gotten over feeling sorry for myself. Sometimes you gotta take the crap and nod your head and understand the concept that it's okay to mess up. Even if it's a big one. Everyone doesn't hate me and I don't need to hate myself. That's tough, but I'm getting better at it.

So during those 4 hours of church I heard a guest speaker's sermon that I've really come to like. His name is Dr. Segraves and I really like his style. I like people that refer to the Bible a lot because it's hard reading the bible by yourself sometimes and it's crazy how one verse that you skim over can be a revalation for another person. His message today was about living in the real world, and how people who don't really know God sorta bash him because of things like the Holocaust. He went through a couple of points throughout scripture but this is the one I bookmarked because I think it's very applicable to a lot of parts in our daily lives...

"I have observed something else under the sun. The fastest runner doesn't always win the race, and the strongest warrior doesn't always win the battle. The wise sometimes go hungry, and the skillful are not necessarily wealthy. And those who are educated don't always lead successful lives. It is all decided by chance, by being in the right place at the right time. People can never predict when hard times might come. Like fish in a net or birds in a trap, people are caught by sudden tragedy."
Ecclesiastes 9:9-12

For me this is pretty great news because I'm definitely not the smartest or fastest or strongest haha. But it's also interesting to think that a Lord with all power leaves room for chance, but as Dr. Segraves continued he backed this up by explaining that this chance is created because God has given us free will. And without free will there would be no such thing as love. Love wouldn't exist unless we would have the ability to choose to not love. So if we all were programmed to respond or act in certain ways then we wouldn't be able to experience love because it wouldn't be special. It wouldn't be a sacrificing and self-less gesture. Instead it would just be a gesture. I thought that was really sick. It's good to know that everything that happens in life does happen for a reason, even if that reason is beyond my understanding. It's good to know that whatever troubles in life I may face are not just because I mess up sometimes. Life isn't a cause and effect chain, there's more to us than that, and I dig it.

Moving on in that book I found another little quote I like...
"As dead flies cause even a bottle of perfume to stink, so a little foolishness spoils great wisdom and honor."
Ecclesiastes 10:1

I think that's so true and I wish people cared about their integrity like a bottle of perfume. I wish people knew how beautiful they could be if they just saw themselves as beautiful, if they saw themselves as something worth keeping.

But we're young and naive. I don't know how to end this so let's just say congratulations to Spain, and boo-hoo for Holland. I don't think they deserved it anyway and I personally think Robben is a tool :)

Keep The Peace my brothers and sisters!

If I could dance to anything right now, this guy would supply my music....


I <3 House.

12:17

I'm making a conscious effort to make my posts shorter, because I really get to rambling sometimes. Sorry :/

For starters... I'm happy.

Regardless of what's happened to me or what family matters are going on or what college stuff I have to get ready or whatever other resposibilities I might not be fulfilling at the moment... I am actually happy.

I really do think happiness is a mental thing. For so many years everyone tells you how to be happy.
I have been spoonfed by many people. Family, friends, strangers, old, young, the successful, and the unsuccessful, and it seems that everyone thinks they know about happiness. Like it's something you can put in a jar and mass produce. Like it's an equation that you can whip out that always comes to the same solution.

Once I stopped looking at everyone to the left, right, front, and back of me. Once I stopped comparing my life. Once I stopped taking advice from the man or woman with the fake smile....... I realized that happiness is inside of me.

If I was dying and had something to say it would be close to that. Please if you're reading this just think about it. Happinness is not a gain or a loss, it isn't a prize to be won by the handsome or most talented. Happiness is by all means attainable by all of us, and it takes God alone to supply that pure joy.

For me, I've noticed that I'm happy when I'm comfortable with myself. Not even neccessarily when I'm having "fun" cause I can be doing some of the most fun things that I like to do and not be the most bit happy. And I think that's a misconception. I've been told that I'll be happy when I find a job that gets me this amount of money or I can be happy with myself when I'm doing what I love. To be honest I'm happy when people don't write me off, when I'm not given a leash or a certain set of rules to follow. I'm happy when I have the opportunity to open up and show people that I'm not just a stupid kid, and that there's more ways to crack this puzzle called life. I'm happiest when I realize that the person I am and the person I have the potential to be is lining up. I'm happy when who I am can be of assistance to someone else. I'm happy when I can help.

The End.

p.s.- I still feel like that's a long post. Hopefully this will change in the near future.

Keep The Peace

Better Off Alone

Places. It's weird how just sights and smells can bring back memories. I wish I could say how I feel right now, but I can't really describe it. I guess I'm more reflective than anything. Four years is a long time to be consumed. Something about this summer is a lot different from all the other ones. I guess I've come to the time where I'm at one with whatever life is going to throw at me. I'm not worrying nor am I super duper excited. I'm just sorta letting it be I guess is the best way to describe it maybe?

Anyways... today I just decided was going to be an Egey day. Egey day's consist of just doing whatever Egey wants to do, which usually makes Egey day's very constructive because I can finally just take care of some stuff that I need to take care of. I decided that I would clean out my closet, watch some soccer, and work on some photos. I accomplished all 3 which was nice and had time to take a nap and work with a couple of songs that I'll be mixing soon. Overall it's been a quality day. Around 7 I decided I needed to get out of the house so I cruised out to Lansdowne to hit the creek and take some pictures. I'm trying to get myself back into using my camera because I love taking shots I just get too lazy to do it now a days. It's pretty funny how the days when you're not looking for anything in particular to shoot you find yourself with lots of subjects at your disposal. I think that's what I like about photography and how I go about it, whatever I get is what I get, and I like to make the best of what I bring and what is in front of me.

As soon as I hopped out my car I saw a deer just chillin in the woods. That's the best feeling, there's just something about nature that just brings me home. I don't know what it is, but I think something about the solitude and the co-existance is what makes me really comfortable. When I was out there today I realized that shooting nature for me is about just being out there. It's about finding that next spot and taking a couple minutes to really tap into the environment and see what's going on. If you look close enough there's these flies that just sidestep back and forth in this dried mud that sits upon the creek rocks. It's fascinating how that is going on while dragonflies are cleaning their wings and fish are swimming in the stream and deer are roaming the woodlands. Life is everywhere, yet there is an un-mentioned respect with these animals that is really beautiful. Animals don't just kill to kill, they don't just eat because they feel like eating berries today, they don't just spend their days wishing they were something else or trying to figure out how to one up their peers. They just live. I find it really interesting how we call people animals when they get out of control and do something crazy, when really animals just seem content. They seem happy in one way or another. It's almost like they've accepted the reality of life and death, and with that reality they've decided to focus on what's truly essential. I feel like that's where the human downfall is somewhat. We have the ability to do great things, but instead we use this ability to control everything instead of positively exist among all other beings. It's weird to think about it that way but I think it's true. God has given these animals the tools to live among other life with a purpose that is embedded within them. I'd like to think that on a simpler level I am similar to these animals. I have a purpose and I can make it in this world without having to be number one at everything. I know my place and I know what I'm here to do. I like that.

As I walk around Goose Creek I realize that I haven't been there in over a year. It seemed just like yesterday when it was me, skogy, andrew, and 'nam hitting that creek up everyday. A lot of who I am is the same, I still where white tee shirts and flip flops, I still love nature, and I still love taking pictures. But I must admit I've changed a lot and just reminiscing at these familiar sites and taking photos there again shows me some things about myself. I don't yearn for the company anymore. Time alone in solitude is time cherished for me now. It's weird, as much as I'm at home wishing I was doing something awesome, I soon realize that I like being my own company a lot more than not. I can think freely and just be me. It's nice not having to talk, not having to care, not having to feel. These moments are the times when I feel as free as I've ever fealt on this Earth.

Life is a sequence of events. A lot of them seem really similar and our wisdom grows and develops everyday. Through taking pictures I've realized that life is a lot like revisiting an old stomping ground like I did today and going through the motions again. When you take pictures you compose in your mind how you want it to look, you frame it with the camera, and then at the right moment you capture it. Life is very similar and I've noticed when you come back to familiar places and do the same thing, you realize how different you are from before and how much you've learned. You look at the same subject and the same environment in a different way, and sometimes that's all it takes. Just a new outlook on what was always there in front of you to begin with.

Cruising through the streets of Lansdowne on my longboard I retraced my footsteps to the home of where an awesome girl I knew used to live. That was the first time I'd seen that house in over a year and I'm not gonna lie it evoked some emotion. I walked to the same playground we hung out at and took a second to remember. No matter how things turn out, we always have the good memories and it's nice to hold on to that. She crosses my mind every once in awhile and to be honest I like to forget all the nonsense that happened and focus on who she was. She's an amazing person and it's people like that in this world that give me hope for the future. When we talked she said she was writing a book, and if you who I'm referring to ever reads this, I hope someday you'll finish that book and remember me cause I want a copy.

Like I said before, people come and people go, but those who take the time to dig deep enough to reach your heart leave a lasting imprint upon it forever. Alright this is becoming a reflective essay so I'm just gonna stop haha. I'll post some before and after pictars of some of these places just so you as well as I can see the difference in these places through my eyes.

"Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered, and that my life is fleeing away. My life is no longer than the width of my hand. An entire lifetimes is juast a moment to you; human existence is but a breath."
Psalm 39

Keep The Peace